Monday, February 05, 2007

TO: Laura Ziskin. RE: Oscar Presenters

You did the right thing getting Ellen. Degeneres has stated in an interview that they aren't going to cutting winners off with music (or like last year's debacle: playing music as the winners talk). Smart move #2. The first four presenters have been released in press relesaes:

From the Oscar website:

George Clooney, Cameron Diaz, Eva Green, Hugh Jackman

All good.

There's numerous other people who are rumored to have been added but not yet confirmed: Jennifer Connelly, Daniel Craig, Kirsten Dunst, Jodie Foster, among others. Apparently Robert De Niro, Clint Eastwood and Warren Beatty are presenting the award to Ennio Morricone. That would be cool. I've also heard that Monica Belluci will be translating for him, which seems almost too odd to be false? Also, given Laura Ziskin is producing Spider-Man 3, I also expect some more people from that film to show up.

And of course, last year's remaining winners - Hoffman, Witherspoon and Weisz - will no doubt be back.

Anywho, here are my suggestions for people I would love to see present:

Michelle Pfeiffer - first and foremost. My 2nd favorite actress has 3 big movies coming out this year. Get her up on stage.

Anne Hathaway - see SAGs to see what I mean.

Sacha Baron Cohen - as himself. Sexy and funny.

Leonardo Dicaprio & Kate Winslet - you missed the chance two years ago to get the stars of the biggest film of all time to present together the year they were nominated together. Now they are nominated again in the same year. I'm sure it'll happen again, though.

Salma Hayek - after the great emotion she showed announcing the nominees, bring her back.

Oprah Winfrey - you know she's going to be there anyways.

Emily Blunt - as if you didn't see this coming. Looking for the usual hot piece of ass ingenue to do the Sci/Tech ceremony? Here it is.

Clive Owen & Cate Blanchett - stars of The Golden Age. Well, Clive would be fine. Clive is fine. Let him present in his underwear. He doesn't even have to present. He can just stand there. Actually, cancel Blanchett and replace her with Chris Evans. On stage, together, in their briefs.

Jane Fonda & Lindsay Lohan - stars of Georgia Rule. This is a great pairing, and they apparently really like each other. Plus, I want to see Lohan at her first big award show.

Amy Poehler as Dakota Fanning - have her present the Visual Effects category - "I'm not familiar with any of these films" - and then glare at Abigail Breslin for awhile.


Oh, and for the love of god, bring back some of the campy stuff. Not like the past couple of years where Beyonce butchers a French song, or the nominees line up on stage, or people present in the middle of the theatre, or the music in the background. I'm talking Costume Design fashion shows, bears on stage for no reason, and freaky Cirque Du Soleil guys dancing as Jennifer Connelly holds her Oscar trying not to get trampled on. Last year's Zombie-Crash number was close!

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