First Look: Kirsten Dunst as Marie Antoinette

I believe this behind the scenes image is from People magazine.

LAND OF THE DEAD TRAILER!!!!!

THE MOVIE YOU'VE (well, maybe not you specifically) WAITED 20 YEARS FOR!!!!!

I KNEW THIS TRAILER WOULD ROCK HARDCORE WHEN I HEARD THE GUY WHO CUT THE DAWN OF THE DEAD & TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE REMAKE TRAILERS WAS DOING IT!!!!!

OH MY!!!!

AGGGHHHHH!!!

ZOMBIES!!!!

TRAILER HERE!!!!!


asia and simon get ready for zombie politics

Summer Movie Preview

PREDICTED TOP OPENINGS:
1. Star Wars: Episode 3 - Revenge of the Sith - $110m (3-day)
2. Batman Begins - $75m
3. War of the Worlds - $68m
4. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - $54m
5. Madagascar - $50m
6. Fantastic Four - $44m
7. Kingdom of Heaven - $38m
8. Mr. & Mrs. Smith - $36m
9. The Wedding Crashers - $34m
10. The Longest Yard - $32m

PREDICTED SLEEPER HITS:
The 40-Year-Old Virgin
The Bad News Bears
Lords of Dogtown
Red Eye

FAILURES:
The Dukes of Hazzard
Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo
The Honeymooners

INDIE BREAKOUTS:
High Tension
Hustle and Flow

SUMMER BOX OFFICE PREDICTIONS:
1. Star Wars: Episode 3 - Revenge of the Sith - $375m
2. War of the Worlds - $250m
3. Batman Begins - $235m
4. Madagascar - $215m
5. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - $160m
6. Kingdom of Heaven - $150m
7. Cinderella Man - $125m
8. Mr. & Mrs. Smith - $120m
9. The Wedding Crashers - $115m
10. Fantastic Four - $110m
11. Bewitched - $100m
12. The Longest Yard - $98m
13. Herbie: Fully Loaded - $86m
14. The Island - $85m
15. Kicking and Screaming - $84m
16. Stealth - $82m
17. The Bad News Bears - $75m
18. Monster-In-Law - $65m
19. The Pink Panther - $60m
20. Domino - $56m
21. Dark Water - $55m
22. Lords of Dogtown - $54m
23. George Romero's Land of the Dead - $52m
24. The Skeleton Key - $50m
25. The Brothers Grimm - $48m
26. Red Eye - $46m
27. The 40-Year-Old Virgin - $45m
28. The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants - $42m
29. The Dukes of Hazzard - $40m
30. Must Love Dogs - $38m
31. The Perfect Man - $36m
32. Untitled Mike Judge Project - $35m
33. Sky High - $34m
34. Four Brothers - $33m
35. House of Wax - $32m
36. Unleashed - $30m
37. The Honeymooners - $29m
38. Rebound - $28m
39. The Adventures of Shark Boy and Lava Girl In 3-D - $26m
40. Crash - $25m

Box Office Predictions: April 29 - May 1; Summer Season Pre-Game

1. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - $28m / $28m / $76m
2. XXX: State of the Union - $26m / $26m / $70m
3. The Interpreter - $15m / $45m / $80m
4. The Amityville Horror - $7m / $54m / $65m
5. Sahara - $6m / $57m / $68m
6. Kung Fu Hustle - $4m / $13.5m / $20m
7. A Lot Like Love - $4m / $13.5m / $19m
8. Fever Pitch - $3.5m / $36m / $41m
9. Guess Who - $2m / $65m / $68m
10. Robots - $2m / $123m / $126m
11. Sin City - $2m / $71m / $74m

News on the movie that was bumped off the list

Cursed will arrive on DVD June 21st. It will come in two different editions: PG-13 & Unrated. The unrated version runs 2 minutes longer. Believe me, a lot can fit into 2 minutes, especially for a horror movie. Both versions will contain the following features:

+2.40:1 Anamorphic Widescreen
+Dolby Digital 5.1 Surround
+"Behind the Fangs: the Making of Cursed"
+"The Cursed Effects"
+"Creature Editing 101"
+"Becoming a Werewolf"
+Commentary by Wes Craven and Kevin Williamson

That last bit should be interesting. I'm hoping Craven spends half of it bashing Dimension Films now that he's moved on to DreamWorks. His commentaries are always fun, though. The disappointing news is that as of now the footages from the earlier shoot of the film will not be on this DVD. Perhaps it is true that Dimension will edit it together to create a sequel. My apologies to Mandy Moore, Skeet Ulrich, Scott Foley, Illeana Douglas and Omar Epps.

News on my Most Anticipated Films of 2005

+The trailer for #2 - George Romero's Land of the Dead - will be debut this weekend attached to most prints of XXX: State of the Union. Expect it online later in the week with the poster shortly to follow.

+James Lipton has a cameo as himself in film #3 - Bewitched. In case you forgot, Will Ferrell used to do impressions of him on Saturday Night Live. My favorite was the one where Kate Hudson played Drew Barrymore on Inside the Actor's Studio. Sample question: what profession would you not like to attempt? Kate as Drew: "I wouldn't want to burn monkeys."

+The trailer for #4 - In Her Shoes - is rumored to debut along with Kingdom of Heaven. Both films are from Fox and Ridley Scott is involved with both - director of KOH, producer of IHS. Shirley MacLaine also stated in an interview with Entertainment Weekly that of her three movies coming out this year, IHS is the one that is Oscar material. (Not a real surprise, but nice to hear it from her.)

+A test screening review of #6 - Syriana - is up at AICN. Read it here.

+The internet is abuzz trying to explain the omission of #1 - Brokeback Mountain - from the Cannes lineup. My money is on it was submitted after the selection committee had most of the festival planned out. But Dark Horizons put up an article today that might explain another reasoning:

"Ang Lee's upcoming film Brokeback Mountain about two young cowboys (Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal) who tumble into love while herding sheep through the Wyoming mountain range during the early '60s, was excluded from the Cannes screening schedule altogether reports AfterElton.

Given Ang Lee's track history, the elimination from the running at Cannes is of note, especially since the contenders this year are helmed by indie cinema darlings like Lars Von Trier, David Cronenberg, Wim Wenders, Jim Jarmusch, and Gus Van Sant (who was originally slotted to direct Brokeback). However, Cannes has also never accepted a film of Lee's for competition, and reportedly don't particularly like him. (DARREN SIDENOTE: He reportedly bitched after The Ice Storm only took home a Screenplay prize.) So the film's rejection from the lineup may have nothing to do with the movie itself, rather with who's directing it.

Why the project didn't measure up at Cannes remains unknown, though the trades reported two weeks earlier that Brokeback Mountain was "looking wobbly for Competition," and confided that the film reportedly "underwhelmed the selection committee."

This comes at odds with other recent reports that many studio executives were "moved to tears" at a recent screening of it. "It's a great American love story," says a source to the paper who confirmed it is unabashed about the gay relationship that is central to the film and there are sex scenes. Whether the famous Heath Ledger skinny dipping photos that surfaced last year were part of the film is unsure though they won't be in the movie's final edit.

One of my most reliable sources who also happens to be one of Dark Horizons' greatest supporters (and a really good friend) also confirmed that people were crying and loving the film at a recent US screening. In fact the move to December 9th seems primarily for Oscar chances and that both Brokeback and Cameron Crowe's Elizabethtown (DARREN SIDENOTE: Elizabethtown is most anticipated movie #8) are looking likely to be big contenders for awards next year."



Larry McMurtry - the co-screenwriter of Brokeback - wrote the source material for The Last Picture Show and Terms of Endearment. Both were also rejected from Cannes. Conspiracy perhaps?

(I had a dream last night I ran into Anna Faris who was about to shoot the movie. Apparently, we were in a high school setting and she got my digits. I was also in the movie somehow because I was very surprised that she was filming a scene tomorrow and I wasn't set to arrive till next week. Later on in the dream, I kept high-fiving the neighbor kids. Probably shouldn't eat peanut butter before I go to bed anymore.)

Random Thoughts: The Interpreter & more

The Interpreter - 8/10
This is the kind of movie I used to love watching on a rainy day: a slick thriller competently made and well acted. It brings nothing new to the genre but offers sleek entertainment for its two hours, intricate but never convoluted. Sydney Pollack is a good director, but the editing was what made the film so good. The screenplay was hit or miss - not a surprise given the many screenwriters - but the majority of the film was well written. The film's final line is perfect. Catherine Keener is underused while Sean Penn is really good and surprisingly seems more movie star than actor. And that Kidman girl ain't too bad, either.

The Amityville Horror (1979) - 3/10
The Amityville Horror (2005) - 3/10
Ugh! Bad bad bad! Having to pick which one to watch again would be like prefering to die by giant snake or mutant spider. The old one is slow and dull, the new is hyped up and dull. The acting in both is pretty bad - Margot Kidder and Melissa George try their best. James Brolin really doesn't have anything to do, while Ryan Reynolds was just a waste of a nice bod. Memo to modern horror makers: cutting scenes very fast and inserting random shots is NOT. SCARY. OR. SUSPENSEFUL. Stop it! I guess you know what you're getting into with any film that ends with the family just leaving.

Guess Who's Coming To Dinner - 10/10
A movie about people dealing with a situation? Wow. Believe it or not, this is the first time I've ever seen a Katharine Hepburn movie. (The tar and feathering can commence now.) I was mighty impressed though with her late partner Spencer Tracey, who in his last performance almost moved me to tears with his ending monologue. Its a brave film that stands surprisingly well up to today. Great, great, great writing.

His Girl Friday - 9/10
My interest in this film came about when I was reading reviews of Gilmore Girls and almost all of them compared it to this movie. Seemed odd at first when you consider what each is about - HGF being about a reporter trying to win back his star reporter. Its the fast paced dialogue and back-and-forth nature of it that is what compares the two. The characters seem to be in a tennis match of words. The audience wins. HGF proves why comedy is best when it relies on the writing and not the goofiness or grossness of events in the film. (Hear that, Ben Stiller?) I adored Rosalind Russell in this, and laughed several times. For a movie that's over 60 years old, that's a great accomplishment.

Connelly joins 'Children'

Remember the Kate Winslet movie from a few weeks back? Jennifer Connelly is now on board Little Children. Sources say there are two more major roles to be cast, one of which will be playing a pedophile. Connelly is said to be playing a woman who schedules sex with her husband in between readying her 4-year-old for Harvard. The Oscar-winner will next be seen in Dark Water, due July 8th.

Congrats to Nicole!

Nicole Kidman welcomed her first #1 film in almost 6 years, not counting her vocal cameo in Panic Room. The Interpreter debuted over the weekend with almost $23 million in box office receipts. (Final numbers will be due out Monday evening.) Her next film, Bewitched, faces competition from Batman Begins when it is released on June 24.

Here, I present, a Nicole Kidman box-office filmography:

1. Batman Forever - $184 million
2. The Others - $96.5 million
3. Cold Mountain - $95.6 million
4. Panic Room - $95.3 million
5. Days of Thunder - $82.7 million
6. The Stepford Wives - $59.5 million
7. Far & Away - $58.9 million
8. Moulin Rouge! - $57.4 million
9. Eyes Wide Shut - $55.6 million
10. Practical Magic - $46.6 million
11. Malice - $46 million
12. The Hours - $41.6 million
13. The Peacemaker - $41.3 million
14. My Life - $27.5 million
15. The Interpreter - $22.8 million and counting
16. To Die For - $21.2 million
17. Billy Bathgate - $16 million
18. Dead Calm - $7.8 million
19. The Human Stain - $5.4 million
20. Birth - $5 million

What's up on Wisteria Lane?

Never saw Desperate Housewives? (Living under a rock? Partially retarded?) Well, on Sunday night, you can catch up with those crazy ladies on an ABC special that will go over the events of the season thus far. Catch up on the S&M handcuffs being washed in dishwashers, crying after ejaculation, genderbent children, suicides, murders, bodies cut up in trunks, Nicolette Sheridan, urns being dumped on enemies, drug dealing soccer moms, horny gardeners, suburban prostitution rings, mother-in-laws prevented from blackmailing by comas, Teri Hatcher falling down, plumbers with sketchy pasts, and all that dirty laundry.



Before that, take this quiz.

Apparently, I want to marry Susan. But the housewife I'm most like is...



EDIE?????

Box Office Predictions: Last Weekend Before Summer Season Kicks Off!

Summer Box Office Predictions coming beginning of next week.

1. The Interpreter - $22m / $22m / $90m
2. The Amityville Horror - $10.5m / $41m / $55m
3. A Lot Like Love - $9m / $9m / $25m
4. Kung Fu Hustle - $8m / $9m / $24m
5. Sahara - $8m / $48m / $62m
6. Fever Pitch - $6m / $32m / $42m
7. King's Ransom - $5m / $5m / $13m
8. Sin City - $4m / $68m / $76m
9. Guess Who - $3m / $62m / $67m
10. Robots - $2m / $119m / $124m


a lot like bland

Fincher Lines Up 'Zodiac' Cast

Jake Gyllenhaal, Mark Ruffalo and Robert Downey Jr have signed on to star in David Fincher's next film Zodiac.

Comingsoon.net: The film is based on Robert Graysmith's 1986 true-crime book "Zodiac" and 2002 sequel "Zodiac Unmasked: The Identity of America's Most Elusive Serial Killer Revealed." Gyllenhaal will portray Graysmith, a San Francisco Chronicle cartoonist who began tracking the mystery of the serial killer. The Zodiac terrorized the San Francisco area from 1966-78, committing at least 37 murders and documenting his exploits in taunting letters sent to the Chronicle. Graysmith believes he identified the killer, but competing investigations and other circumstances prevented the suspect, who died in 1992, from ever being apprehended. Ruffalo will portray the lead investigator in the case, Downey a reporter.

Fincher, director of Seven and Panic Room, is also a producer of this summer's Lords of Dogtown.

Films to play at Cannes

Two notable omissions; read about them below this Variety article:

"Established auteurs are back with a vengeance this year in an English-lingo heavy Cannes Film Festival official line-up, unveiled Tuesday by artistic director Thierry Fremaux. As widely expected, Cannes faves back on the Croisette next month include David Cronenberg, Michael Haneke, Wim Wenders, Jean-Pierre and Luc Dardenne, Atom Egoyan, Amos Gitai, Hou Hsiou-hsien, Jim Jarmusch, Gus Van Sant and Lars Von Trier.

The only first film to nab a competition slot this year is Tommy Lee Jones' "The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada," repping the U.S. along with Frank Miller and Robert Rodriguez' "Sin City," Gus Van Sant's "Last Days" and "Broken Flowers" by Jim Jarmusch. In all there are nine English lingo films out of 20 pics in competition.

Woody Allen's "Match Point" and George Lucas' "Star Wars Episode III -- Revenge of the Sith" are among pics screened out of competition during the fest, which runs May 11-22.

While Michael Moore's "Fahrenheit 911" was the controversial winner of the Golden Palm last year, docus are absent from the competition this time, although Brit helmer Adam Curtis' neo-conservative critique "The Power of Nightmares" will receive a special screening. There are also no animated films in competition.

In four years at the fest, Fremaux has earned a reputation for last-minute decision making, but 'down to the wire' has taken on a new resonance this year. Organisers did not settle on the opening night film -- Dominik Moll's in competition "Lemming" -- until late Monday. Gallic helmer Moll was in competition at Cannes in 2000 with his second film, "With a Friend Like Harry."

And at Tuesday's press conference, it emerged that the fest was not ready to announce the make-up of the jury headed by Emir Kusturica.

Full details of all four juries -- the Competition, Un Certain Regard, Cinefondation and Short Film Competition, would be announced next week, managing director Veronique Cayla promised.

Among festival's extra curricular events, Catherine Deneuve will give the fest's "acting lesson" this year, while Senegalese helmer Ousmane Sembene will give a "director's lesson."

CANNES 2005: OFFICIAL SELECTION

IN COMPETITION
“Bashing,” Japan, Masahiro Kobayashi
“Battle in the Sky,” Mexico, Carlos Reygadas
“The Best of our Times,” Taiwan-Japan, Hou Hsiao-Hsien
“Broken Flowers,” France-U.S., Jim Jarmusch
“Cache,” France-Austria-Germany-Italy, Michael Haneke
“Don’t Come Knockin’,” Germany-France, Wim Wenders
“Election,” Hong Kong, Johnny To
“L’Enfant,” Belgium, Jean-Pierre and Luc Dardenne
“Free Zone,” Israel-Belgium, Amos Gitai
“A History of Violence,” U.S.-Canada, David Cronenberg
“Kilometre Zero,” Iraq, Hiner Saleem
“Last Days,” U.S., Gus Van Sant
“Lemming,” France, Dominik Moll
“Manderlay,” Denmark-Sweden-Netherland, Lars Von Trier
“Quando Sei Nato Non Puoi Piu Nasconderti,” Italy, Marco Tullio Giordana
“Peindre ou Faire L’Amour,” France, Arnaud and Jean-Marie Larrieu
“Shanghai Dreams,” China, Wang Xiaoshuai
“Sin City,” U.S., Frank Miller, Robert Rodriguez
“The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada,” U.S., Tommy Lee Jones
“Where the Truth Lies,” Canada, Atom Egoyan

OUT OF COMPETITION
“Chromophobia,” France-U.S.-U.K., Martha Fiennes
“Joyeux Noel,” France-Germany-UK-Belgium, Christian Carion
“Match Point,” UK, Woody Allen
“Star Wars – Episode III – Revenge of the Sith,” U.S., George Lucas

MIDNIGHT SCREENINGS
“A Bittersweet Life,” South Korea, Kim Jee-woon
“Kiss, Kiss, Bang, Bang,” U.S., Shane BlackShane Black
“Land of the Dead,” U.S., George Romero
“Midnight Movies,” Stuart Samuels

SPECIAL SCREENINGS
“The Artistes of the Burnt Theater,” Cambodia-France, Rithy Panh
“C’est Pas Tout a Fait la Vie Dont J’avais Reve,” France, Michel Piccoli
“Crossing the Bridge,” Germany, Fatih Akin
“Nekam Achat Mishtey Eynay,” Israel, Avi Mograbi
“The Power of Nightmares,” U.K., Adam Curtis
“Princess Raccoon,” Japan, Seijun Suzuki

UN CERTAIN REGARD 2005
“Cidade Baixa,” Brazil, Sergio Machado
“Movies, Aspirin and Vultures,” Brazil, Marcelo Gomes
“Get Up and Walk,” Burkino Faso, S. Pierre Yameogo
“Down in the Valley,” U.S., David Jacobson
“Low Profile,” Germany, Christoph Hochhausler
“Le Filmeur,” France, Alain Cavalier
“Hwal,” South Korea-Japan, Kim Ki-duk
“Jewboy” (short feature), Australia, Tony Kravitz
“Johanna,” Hungary, Kornel Mundruczo
“The King,” U.S.-U.K., James Marsh
“The Death of Domnului Lazarescu,” Romania, Cristi Puiu
“North East,” France-Argentina-Belgium, Juan Solanas
“Blood,” Mexico, Amat Escalante
“Sleepers,” Austria, Benjamin Heisenberg
“Tawa Dura Yanna,” Sri Lanka, Vimukthi Jayasundara
“Le Temps Qui Reste,” France, Francois Ozon
“The Forgotten Forest,” Japan, Kohei Oguri
“Grown Up People,” Denmark, Dagur Kari
“One Night,” Iran, Niki Karimi
“Yellow Fella” (short), Australia, Ivan Sen
“Zim And Co.,” France, Pierre Jolivet

I think A History of Violence will take something home. That's all I'm predicting. Interesting absences from the lineup: Ang Lee's Brokeback Mountain and Ron Howard's Cinderella Man. Man was suppose to debut out of competition, while Mountain's placing has been anyone's guess the past couple of months. Was this true or was it all just speculation? BM wasn't finished till mid-March, so it might not have screened in time.

Kick it wit Nicole this week!

The Interpreter opens Friday. I won't be seeing it until Monday and will have my review up by this time next week. It is getting very favorable reviews so far with many saying its one of Nic's best performances. People were apt to criticize the accent at first, but all of the reviews say its fine. It should be, since its not a real accent. Anywho, you'll have to wait till June to hear her FLAWLESS American accent in Bewitched. No "Crikey! Me Arm!"'s here.

Birth comes to DVD today. Check it out. Its a very good film that I think creeped out most of the people who thought negatively of it. The rest may have been turned off by the twist. The cinematography and score are top tier, and the film's Kubrickian aura will stay with you long after its over. The final image of Nic on the beach is one of the most haunting and devastating in any movie in some time.

Enjoy these two offerings from my very favorite actress. I've checked the talk show circuit and believe she will just be on The View probably sitting in a Star Jones-Reynolds fart cloud.

Funny People Poehler and Bateman Team Up

Arrested Development's Jason Bateman and Saturday Night Live's Amy Poehler will star in The Heartbreak Kid, a remake of a Cybil Shepard/Charles Grodin film. The Dreamworks film is about a man who finds out on his honeymoon that his new bride is a psychopath. It will shoot this summer. How perfect is this movie! In the meantime, I love Amy. She cracks me up. She was always that goofy looking, oddly hot chick on Upright Citizens Brigade but has really made her place in the lackluster world of funny ladies. Here's an article from People about her:

Amy Poehler might owe James Gandolfini an apology. When the Sopranos star made an appearance on Saturday Night Live last October, he nervously approached Poehler before the "Weekend Update" segment to ask for any pointers she might offer. Unfortunately it was Poehler's first night doing "Update," and she wasn't feeling particularly helpful. "I said, 'No! I don't have any advice. Don't talk to me.'" she recalls. "I was completely panicked."

Now, playing a fake news anchor comes as easily as the other roles she's played during her four seasons on SNL, which include characters such as Michael Jackson, Avril Lavigne, Madonna and a one-legged loudmouth with gastrointestinal issues named Amber. "You can't go halfway," says Poehler. "If you don't allow yourself to look crazy and silly, your vanity will get in the way."

"She'll try anything," says "Update" coanchor and head writer Tina Fey. "And she's physically fearless. She hit her head coming out of a garbage chute for a sketch once and had five seconds of 'Where am I?' She just blacked out on TV."

Less dangerous roles have included that of an overly lax mom in last year's Mean Girls, and she has a recurring guest spot on FOX's Arrested Development, playing the seal-trading wife of her real-life husband, Will Arnett. "We both have no problem looking like idiots to each other or other people," says Poehler with a laugh. "We will stand in the bathroom in front of our double sinks and have contests to see who can make the queerest, most disgusting face. It gets serious. Like, 'Good job. How about this?'"

Such antics fit right into what she describes as SNL's "college dorm" environment. "Last week we had a spontaneous pushup contest," she says. "I don't think many workplaces have that."

Although she describes herself as being more "tomboyish and bossy" as a kid rather than as the class clown, Poehler learned to take-and deliver-a joke early on. "My family is very witty, so you had to earn your place at the table," says Poehler, 33, who was raised by two high school teachers, Bill and Eileen, in Burlington, Mass. (Her younger brother Gregory is a lawyer in the same building where SNL is shot.) As a communications major at Boston College, Poehler planned to become "a teacher, a journalist or an actor," she says. But after joining the campus improv group, "I was totally intoxicated," she says. "You get one genuine laugh, you just want it again, even if you spend the next 10 years being a waitress."

Poehler's parents were less than impressed. "We thought she'd get a nice little 9-to-5 job," says Eileen. "She told us that she was going to Chicago to be an improv comic, and we were like, 'Oh my God.'" Adds Bill: "$80,000 down the tubes."

While studying and performing at Chicago's Second City and Improv-Olympics, where she first met Fey, Poehler made a living from waitressing and odd jobs, like being a lighting stand-in for Gina Gershon in 1996's Bound. ("I got a hundred bucks for that!" she says. ) She moved to New York that same year, into a West Village basement apartment with improv partner Matt Besser. "There were bars on the windows, and you could see people's legs walking by," she says. "There were rats, we had an occasional peeping Tom. It was horrible."

But professionally? Things were looking up. Thanks to connections from Chicago, she started getting small parts in skits on Late Night with Conan O'Brien. At the same time she was performing with Besser, along with partners Ian Roberts and Matt Walsh in the improv troupe Upright Citizens Brigade, which got its own show on Comedy Central in 1998. (Poehler still performs at the troupe's Manhattan theater most Sunday evenings.)

It was while she was performing in 1996 that Arnett, 34, first laid eyes on Poehler. "I went with my then-girlfriend, and she was like, 'You have a crush on that girl!'" says Arnett. "Amy did stick out. She was fantastic and obviously really cute." Four years later they began dating after meeting through friends. "He makes me feel very safe," she says. "You can have a lot of adventures if you have someone by your side."

Despite three seasons on cable, SNL was a whole new stage for Poehler. "My first week, I had to sit down and say, 'Don't worry who's been here before or you'll get totally paralyzed.'" She still gets starstruck, as during a U2 rehearsal last year. "Bono comes over and hugs you, and you have this surreal moment," she says. Still, SNL's season finale May 21 will mean she'll get more face time with Arnett, whom she married in 2003. (She has been commuting to L.A., where Arrested is shot, every two to three weeks.) "We're happy just to spend time together," says Poehler. "We spread out and read each other the paper." And, of course, compete to see who'll go further for a laugh. "One July 4th, Will came out in a stars-and-stripes apron with nothing underneath," she says. "He's pretty fearless too."

This Sunday, Stay Inside and Get Arrested

Hard to believe it but the season finale of Arrested Development is Sunday night. Its been a fun season complete with Star Wars videos, Anne/Egg, Afternoon Delight, shemales, cross dressing nannies, poofs, Motherboy, rape horn, Pop-Pop, the Blue Man Group, hooks, bizarre chicken impressions and secular dry humping. Marc Cherry, creator of Desperate Housewives, will appear on Sunday night. And despite worries and campaigns and what have you, it won't be the last season of Arrested Development. The show will be back. Whether its Fox, FX or HBO, it will be back. In the meantime, work on those Emmy 'For Your Considerations!'

Box Office Predictions - Apr 15 - 17

1. The Amityville Horror - $20m / $20m / $50m
2. Sahara - $11.5m / $35m / $55m
3. Fever Pitch - $8m / $23m / $38m
4. Sin City - $7.5m / $63m / $80m
5. Guess Who - $5m / $58m / $70m
6. Beauty Shop - $4.5m / $32m / $40m
7. Robots - $3.5m / $115.5m / $124m
8. Miss Congeniality 2 - $2.5m / $41m / $45m
9. The Pacifier - $2m / $103m / $106m
10. The Upside of Anger - $2m / $15m / $20m


melissa george fights off the haunted fridge

Zombies Vs. Witch - What's a boy to do!

Wow, I did NOT see THIS coming. George Romero's Land of the Dead - my second most anticipated film of the year - has been bumped up to June 24 to place it opposite Herbie: Fully Loaded and Bewitched - my third most anticipated film of the year. And I thought the dilemna a few months back with October 7th was bad. (In Her Shoes, Niki Caro Project and Brokeback Mountain - most anticipated of the year - were all scheduled. This issue has since been resolved.) I'm very anxious about this move, but I will be seeing Land of the Dead first on that date. This, in case you are severely impaired in some way, is the fourth film in Romero's great "Living Dead" series. It focuses on an uprising from the lower class after the rich have a built-in city protecting them from the outside world which is rampaged by the undead. Land of the Dead was originally set for release October 21. It stars Simon Baker (The Ring Two, L.A. Confidential,) Dennis Hopper (Speed) and Asia Argento (XXX, daughter of Suspiria director Dario.) Universal bumped Doom, starring The Rock and Karl Urban, to Land's old release date from its original August date.

Random Thoughts...

Coal Miner's Daughter - 8/10
Sissy Spacek's forceful tour - tour de force - performance as Loretta Lynn dominates this sweet and simple biopic. Not only does she believably start off the film at 14, she has a perfectly twangy voice that made me wonder why the Oscar winner (for this film!) never had a second career. She did earn a Grammy nomination for her work here, too. Tommy Lee Jones is equally impressive and makes a humane and sympathetic character out of a man some would not consider to be so.

Fever Pitch - 8/10
Its not a generic romcom. Its not a sports movie. Its not a Farrelly Brothers movie...even though it technically is. Its a very sweet relationship comedy that follows the evolving relationship between a Red Sox fan and a workaholic. That's one aspect not being played up in the ads: how addicted Barrymore's character is to her job. The actual true ending to the story - with the Sox finally winning - ends up just being an afterthought and has little to do with the actual film. Barrymore and Fallon are terrific here and there is some great chemistry. I'm convinced Barrymore's energy and could allow her to generate chemistry with just about anyone, though. Fever Pitch sets aside what the trailers and ads make it out to be and is more about dealing with the person you're in a relationship with. The majority of the humor comes from little moments instead of raunchy gross out gags or oddball supporting characters. Here it comes: its a homerun.

Winslet leads dynamic threesome!

Yes, Kate Winslet and the words "threesome" sure sound appealing right now, eh? Anywho, the dashing Miss Winslet will star in Little Children. The film will be directed by Todd Field (In the Bedroom) and is based on the novel by Tom Perrotta (author of Election.) How's that for a threesome?




Little Children is set in suburban town where the children are perfect but the adults surt the internet for porn by day and have affairs by night. Winslet will play Sarah, who has a fling with one of the fathers. Sounds intriguing, eh? What's with the eh's? Its like I'm Canadian all of the sudden. Anywho, this sounds wonderfully wicked and could be one of my most anticipated films of 2006. I've checked the list of films for next year and it really seems to be a pile of shit.

Elizabethtown Site Up

It has nothing but a pretty picture of Kirsten and Orlando looking at Kentucky. But its worth checking out just because. Enjoy. (Register for updates, too. I did!)

Go here.

Renee Zellweger called ABC...

...she wants her face back.


not renee zellweger

So I like Grey's Anatomy. And I like Ellen Pompeo. However, I can barely look at her whenever she is on. The resemblence is uncanny. (I also like Sandra Oh, who does not resemble Renee Zellweger.) Miss Pompeo appeared in Old School, Moonlight Mile (see below) and had scenes deleted from Daredevil and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. She is quite enjoyable on the show even when I can't look at her. I just thought I'd point this out because I have nothing better to post about. Well, actually, Desperate Housewives kicked serious ass tonight. It was a far more dramatic episode than usual. It marked a season high for Eva Longoria, bound to sadly go down in the award show circuit as this show's Kristin Davis. Many look at her as being a bitch and selfish. I find myself understanding her actions and feel slightly ostrasized when I read people talking about what an awful bitch Gabrielle is. Tonight marked the return of John and Shirtless John. As Mary Alice informed us at the beginning of the episode, Gabrielle is now with child. I think the other reason tonight was so great is that the pacing was excellent. The show sometimes falters when jumping between storylines but tonight's walked the tight rope perfectly. Each story was interesting and didn't cause the show to lag. Oh, and we now have Wisteria Lane's resident transexual. What a wonderful show!

Bottom line: Ellen Pompeo and Renee Zellweger were switched at birth. And Arrested Development was funny as always.

renee and jake...err..ellen and jake

Zellweger left another message for ABC: she wants her voice back, too.

(SNL was bleh, as always. Diaz gave it her all, but she can only meet the writers halfway.)

Random Thoughts...

Hitch - 5/10
This is a movie custom made to please everyone. You can just tell by the safe casting that no one was meant to be offended, not like anyone would be. Rank this one in the long line of mediocre comedies to just exist on screen with little energy. Where's Mark Waters when you need him? Will Smith is charming, Kevin James is Kevin James - a good thing - but Eva Mendes is above it all.

The Jacket - 5/10
Interesting premise that never quite pans out. Worth seeing for Keira Knightley's gloriously failed attempt at a Winona Ryder impression. (Yes, you see her tits in this, too.)

Kramer Vs. Kramer - 9/10
Simple and moving character study with Dustin Hoffman and Meryl Streep at their best. Both very much deserved Oscars for their performances. The kid was also very good even if he was never heard from again.

Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous - 4/10
Comedy sequels should not run 115 minutes. Write that down studios. Sandra Bullock does her very best and paired perfectly with Regina King, but there's little else to see her. I spent most of the movie thinking about how much Heather Burns (Miss Rhode Island) would pass for Kirsten Dunst's older sister.

Robots - 7/10
A highly entertaining piece of fluff which will serve as a nice if slight break from the crap being thrown out by the studios now. Robin Williams had me in tears throughout most of the film even if his character didn't top Eddie Murphy's Donkey or Ellen Degeneres' Dory.

Sense and Sensibility - 8/10
Exquisitely written by star Emma Thompson, this is a charming, well paced period piece featuring top notch costumes, cinematography and acting. Hard to believe Kate Winslet was only 19 here.

Sin City - 8/10
Putting the visual pizazz of Sky Captain with the neonoir hipness of Pulp Fiction, Sin City is a firecracker that while never quite matching either of those films does manager to deliver 2 hours of fun performances, visual razzle dazzle and delirious ultraviolence. The cast has a blast with their roles and you see new dimensions of "actors" you wouldn't have thought had these capabilities. Some of the casting is damn near inspired. Glad to see producers are starting to see how perfect Elijah Wood is at playing a creep. Mickey Rourke, in particular, gives the first great performance of 2005 by an actor. (Sorry, haven't seen Melinda & Melinda or The Upside of Anger.) You feel for Marv every step of the way and the actor, free from his B-movie roots while at the same time right at home in this world, is a revelation. I think my favorite woman in the film was Jamie King as the classic noir blonde twins. The scene of her firing at Marv was one of my favorite moments of the film. Rodriguez has a way with these actors and much like Tarantino can take any actors and put them in a perfect role. I've always believed that any actor can do great with the right role and the right director. I liked Clive Owen's tale because I like Clive Owen and I like women running around being bitches and tarts. And yes, I even liked Jessica Alba. It goes back to that casting thing. Sin City is a hell of a dark ride. See it.

Box Office Predictions: Apr. 8-10

1. Fever Pitch - $16m / $16m / $55m
2. Sahara - $15m / $15m / $44m
3. Sin City - $13m / $52m / $80m
4. Guess Who - $8m / $52m / $74m
5. Beauty Shop - $6.5m / $26m / $38m
6. Robots - $6.5m / $113m / $128m
7. Miss Congeniality 2 - $4.5m / $38m / $46m
8. The Pacifier - $4m / $101m / $108m
9. The Upside of Anger - $3m / $12.5m / $22m
10. The Ring Two - $3m / $72m / $76m

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